Heres to dressing like a prep and talking like a punk

No joke. I look like I just rolled out of the hamptons right now. I am wearing a white sweater and like a classy shirt and jeans (rolled up once of course) and white sperrys with seashells on them. Im only this preppy right now because I decided to go after my one true love: Chuck Bass. Oh gossip girl how i love you. No joke though. People lately have asked me did you like going to private school for pretty much your whole life? And to be honest, I loved it. I was sheltered for a lot longer than most kids so I didnt really grow up too fast. And also, private school made me realize the kind of person that i dont want to be. I do not want to be the stuck up rich private school girl sterotype. I want to just be me. I am not going to act like i have something or that i am something when im not. Private school definately has its advantages but you have to make sure that while your at one, you stay true to yourself even if your true self doesnt quite fit in with the rest of the people. It really is not that big of a deal. Just because you dont fit in, in one place doesnt mean you dont fit in anywhere. But in all seriousness, I just stepped out of a J Crew catalog with my outfit. I feel weird hahaha.

So. grrr. Most people know that I have a lot of pet peeves. So when choosing friends I pretty much go with the ones that have the least of my pet peeves. Its a problem I have I know and its not the best thing in the world and I really struggle with it a lot. Its not like i really like the fact that certain things really make me angry. And my mom and many people have helped me out tremendously in realizing whats something to really get upset about and whats just a small issue. I have learned to control my tone because when i say something you cant take it for face value. You have to understand my tone to understand the context of what I am trying to say. I never intentionally try to hurt people or anything like that.

I want to be clear about something. I have no hatred in my heart for you. Like ive said before in some of my other posts, I want the best for you and my hopes is that because we were only us for such a short time, that we will have the ability to get past our stubborn ways and just be friends. Your a great person and when you try, you are an amazing friend. I want you to be careful and take care of yourself. You have so much potential but life gets harder as you get older and you have to be driven to push yourself to reach that potential. I hope that we can stay close because I know you can do big things but you just have to believe that yourself.

AND why is it that people think that because you are hanging out with someone that you are mutually friends with they are automatically invited? Do not use me for your well being. Just because we were best friends doesnt mean we are anymore. Things are different, times have changed and i really dont value our friendship anymore. During our first year of college you dipped out and were more concerned about other distractions and you forgot about me. I tried many times to reconnect with you but you were always to busy for me. So ya it sucks because now im too busy for you. Dont act so nonchalant about everything because im not gonna be the same ohmygoshsohappytoseeyou person that i was when we were close friends. Sorry :/ you did it to yourself.

I know this guy. And he has become probably my closest friend. And it honestly is SOOO scary how well he can read me. NO other person on the face of the earth can read me the way he does. Like he figured out something that i felt like i hid very very well. He realized that something that has been getting me down for a while now is actually something that doesnt really upset me at all. He is a great friend. And i am very thankful :]

-Kim